A Brief History of My Magical Development

“A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.”

—Laozi

Here then, is the first of many posts to come. As mentioned in my “About” page, I’ve been going back and forth for a long time about creating not only a blog but a proper website to document my exploration into the magical and the occult. I wanted something more than just another page on Tumblr, and having a dedicated plot of Internet-land to host such a venture was probably inevitable. So, as I approach the dawn of my 33rd solar return, an event that feels significant for reasons I have yet to understand, I will mark today as my first real step on a journey of learning and discovery in the world of magic as more than a lay interest or “hobbyist” approach.

And where better to begin than to look back at where I’ve come from? Magic and witchcraft have long been interests of mine, even if only in a daydreamy sense. The earliest I can think of when I really started considering magic beyond games of pretend was around third grade, when I was introduced to the world of Dungeons and Dragons via Baldur’s Gate. I enjoyed that game immensely, and it immediately established my love of fantasy RPGs, carrying over into other Black Isle titles such as Icewind Dale and Planescape: Torment (my favorite RPG of all time), as well as other RPGs outside the domain of Wizards of the Coast.

There were books too, of course. The Magic Treehouse series, The Amulet of Samarkand, and Harry Potter, naturally, among many others. Bless Me, Ultima introduced me to curanderismo and instilled in me a longing for a stronger connection to my Hispanic heritage; around the age of 14, I bought my first witchy book, Ileana Abrev’s White Spells, which I thought might take me in that direction. (Alas, it hasn’t yet come about, but still I hope.) I learned about animism by studying the Force. Jonny Quest led me to reading the books of Ezekiel, Isaiah, and Revelations, which paired nicely with the “end times” prophecies I’d read from the occasional Weekly World News. (This was Y2K, so there was PLENTY of that to go around.) So much popular media formed the basis of so many trips to into the occult, if only for a brief foray, but some were significantly more impactful. Kingdom Hearts introduced me to the character Sephiroth, which led to me learning about the Tree of Life from the Kabbalah. I spent weeks, months even, printing out articles in the school library to read later at home. This was reinforced by watching Neon Genesis Evangelion for the first time, replete with Abrahamic imagery as it is. How could I not learn about the Western Esoteric Tradition with so much of it plainly in front of me? After a time, the interest slowly started to fade but was brought back in full force thanks to Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood. This was I think the most poignant exposure I had at the time to Hermeticism, due to alchemy being a necessary plot structure to the series. All of this was accompanied by various puddle-jumps and rabbit holes across Wikipedia and other sites, diving into topics like the Golden Dawn, the Left-Hand Path, shamanism, Greco-Egyptian mythology and ritual. I was obsessed.

All this happened before I graduated high school. Sometime around my sophomore or junior year, I came across Dan Brown’s Angels and Demons on my aunt’s bookshelf. It was interesting enough, but it set the stage for me to pick up The Lost Symbol years later, which I still consider one of the most influential pieces of media on my magical and philosophical development overall. But it wasn’t until the Jupiter/Venus conjunction in 2015 that I actually started practicing witchcraft. At the time, I was dating someone who was not shy about being a witch. It wasn’t like a loudly proclaimed all the time sort of thing, but neither was it hidden away like a secret. On that night, or one very close to it, we did some energy work with each other, and I felt….something. Not just our energy exchanges, but something deeper, as if part of me suddenly woke up. I’d been getting back into using Tumblr not too long before this, and soon discovered that it was a HUGE and fruitful resource to use for further digging and learning. I stumbled across sigil magic and was almost instantly infatuated with the practice, and began learning about Chaos magic. I started sharing my experiences with my other partner and now-spouse, who has encouraged me every step of the way since. Diving more seriously and earnestly into astrology made clear my affinity for Jupiter/Zeus, then the classical planets in general, and now also Mercury/Hermes. I learned to read Tarot, like many baby witches, then moved onto playing cards. It was through Ana Cortez’ The Playing Card Oracles that I discovered geomancy, and from there found The Digital Ambler, although I think I had stumbled across the blog sometime prior while looking up magic circles.

And now here I am, having taught several workshops on sigil magic (both independently and in association with my dear friend Nina), doing public readings at two different events and looking for more, and seriously considering magic as a career. Apparently some of my natal placements suggest that as a solid, successful path, and though I feel like I still have a lot to learn before I can really commit to the role, it seems…right. Inevitable, almost. Like this always a path I was going to end up on, and now I’m consciously taking that first, tentative step. The road goes ever on and on, and I’m excited to see where this one leads me.

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